Eden Log

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Ages ago when I was in high school I wrote an extremely abstruse short story for an English class that was riddled with references that no one could decipher except for myself. I thought it was oh-so-clever, a mini Finnegan's Wake. When after reciting it I was presented with a room of blank stares I proudly went about explaining the symbolism. No one cared. I realized then that if one wants to create both a successful and weird/obscure/dissonant story, at least include a layer that is accessible to the casual reader. Eden Log doesn't make such an attempt.

If an interminably long-feeling movie centered around an amnesiac man groping around in near darkness in an environment filled with broken plastic junk, tubes-n-wires, and columns of tree roots whilst pursued by cheesy looking humanoid monsters sounds appealing then this movie is for you!

The movie is about a not-too-distant world where energy is harvested from an enormous tree. The "power plant" (haha - cute) named Eden Log is a secret subterranean facility where columns of tree root are exposed for study, experimentation, and work associated with energy generation. Eden Log is populated by human subjects, mutants, technical staff, and a militaristic guard. Humans are intravenously given sap from this special tree which does (2) things: 1) creates a symbiotic relationship between plant and human wherein both species develop a biological understanding of the other and 2) humans are subsequently infected during sap exposure and mutated into dumb humanoid monsters that are then boxed and suspended in the tree canopy. The tree generates energy while digesting the subjects. Things would be dandy except that there is a revolt among the Eden Log population forcing an intervention by the militaristic guard.
If this makes any sense at all I promise it makes less sense in the movie.

On another level it's a modern retelling of Genesis and the Resurrection. The main character, the amnesiac, is Adam in the Garden of Eden (Eden Log). He awakens (born), almost naked and wanders around trying to make sense of this new place. Ultimately what he's seeking is knowledge (Tree of Knowledge) but once he obtains that knowledge the damage is irreversible. He meets a woman (Eve) who tricks him into having the tree sap injected into his system whereupon he mutates (Fall of Man). He gets a data disk (apple) containing information pertaining to his own identity and the purpose of Eden Log. In order to solve the rest of the puzzle, the viewer has to link the Garden of Eden to the Resurrection. In Christian lore the fall of man (disobeying God by eating the apple) is the first original sin from which mankind is not absolved from until the sacrifice of the crucifixion. So lock and step, the movie closes the loop by having the main character (forgot his name) sacrifice himself while saying something to the effect of I'm doing this for all of humanity while thrusting a tree limb into his stomach with arms outstretched as if on a cross.
If this makes any sense at all I promise it makes less sense in the movie.

I think the movie would have been tolerable if the main protagonist acted in a believable way. Try to put yourself in this position: you, an amnesiac, suddenly wake up in a dark cave, disoriented, freezing cold in the mud, surrounded by dead bodies, and when finally another person is encountered you ask them ... nothing. Our protagonist just isn't curious about his predicament I suppose. What might you wonder in such a situation? Where am I? Why am I here? How do I get out? Are there any weapons? What is your name? What year is this? Who is chasing me? On and on ad infinitum.

The problem is that everything is so incredibly stupid, slow, and nonsensical in this movie. When a character walks into a big dark cavern we have to watch him slowly walk the entire length of the big dark cavern to get to the other side (60-120 seconds). When a character is breathing heavily trying to crawl up a tube we have to watch them heave slowly through 50 feet of tube (another 60-120 seconds). All this wasted time accumulates. I kept fast forwarding the movie.

I gave it 2 1/2 stars because the movie was compelling enough to watch in its entirety but I will never give it a 2nd viewing and the notion of purchasing this movie is laughable. However, I notice that several reviewers really enjoyed this movie and gave it a high star rating. There is merit to that. Maybe you will like it too.

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